Feeling Overwhelmed? Lets Get Grounded!
By: Kilondra Davis, MA, LMHC, NCC
We've all made the statement of "I feel overwhelmed" in some capacity. It could be with work, school, family, finances, friends, big life decisions, or other areas of our life that is calling for our attention. Typically when we get to the point of overwhelm, it can feel as if everything is falling on our shoulders at the same time and it seems as if there is no easy fix, that we can't manage it all, and that it is all just...too....heavy.
Being overwhelmed can look different for everyone, but for most, it can feel as if you are being overloaded from one or multiple stressors. Once we are at a state of overwhelm, it can get very difficult to make clear and rational decisions. It is as if our emotions are in control and it becomes challenging to find a solution, to feel at ease, and even believe that there will be an end to the feelings. Our negative self-talk begins to increase and thoughts like "I can't do it", "this is too much", "its always something", "I'm not good enough", "everything I try doesn't work", "there isn't any point to this", and even "life isn't worth it" start to creep into our mind and take up space.
This is where grounding comes in!
Grounding is an intentional skill that can be developed to help your mind shift from the distressing thoughts and events to being present in the here and now.
The stimuli that is causing us to feel overwhelmed are typically things that will happen in the future, or that have happened in the past, but typically are not things in the present. For example, there can be a big decision you need to make with work in the next 3 weeks, or a financial challenge that could result in your lights being turned off, or maybe there is a big exam coming up, or it could be thinking of all of the past mistakes and contemplating how things will be different in the future. Whatever it is for you that is causing a flood of intense unpleasant emotions like fear, guilt, anger, frustration, sadness, panic, worry, doubt...grounding will bring you to the present. It will bring you to the current moment, day and time. It will increase a sense of control, hope, and relief. Grounding will allow for a breather and give you a clear mind.
Here are some Techniques to Help When The Overwhelming Feelings Come:
Grounding Techniques:
5,4,3,2,1
Name 5 Things You See, 4 Things you can Touch, 3 Things you can Hear, 2 Things you can Smell, and 1 Thing you can Taste
Touch as many things as you can
Focus on the differing textures of each item
Deep Breathing with Affirmations
Inhale for 4 seconds, hold the breath for 7 seconds, and exhale for 8 seconds
As you breathe in, think/say an affirmation and when you exhale, think/say what you want to release
Ex: I am breathing in peace, and exhaling chaos
Naming as many things you see around you
Splashing your face with cold water
Holding Ice
Count as many items that you see around you
Focus on and smell a pleasant scent
Focus on and intentionally have a snack/drink
Take a walk and focus on what you see around you
Coping Techniques:
Make a list of what you can and cannot control
Create boundaries of what you will and will not do/tolerate
Utilize affirmations
Self-Soothe
Create a list of solutions
Prioritize what is immediate to not immediate
Break down the task into smaller pieces
Create a list of emotionally supportive individuals who could help
Create a list of individuals who can help
Feel and Release the emotion in a constructive way
Eat and Sleep Adequately
"You don't have to figure everything out today. You don't have to solve all of your problems tonight. And you don't have to tackle everything at once. You can focus on the most immediate thing in front of you. Trust that you will handle the rest along the way"
- Daniell Koepke
Take a deep breath. You got this.